0:00 – Intro Music
0:26 – Affirmation:
“I was not delivered unto this world in defeat, nor does failure course in my veins. I am not a sheep waiting to be prodded by my shepherd. I am a lion and I refuse to talk, to walk, to sleep with the sheep. I will hear not those who weep and complain, for their disease is contagious. Let them join the sheep. The slaughterhouse of failure is not my destiny.”
- Og Mandio, The Greatest Salesman in the World.
1:00 – Intro to Reneau
- Author, speaker and educator
- Author of several books surrounding emotions and mental health
- Most recent is Anger: Taming the beast
- Favourite Quote: “in life pain is inevitable, but suffering is optional”
2:55 – What is anger. How do you deal with it?
- Broad view of anger, you experience it everyday
- Low level is irritation, high level is rage. Same emotion, it just depends on the level.
- Anger is a normal human reaction.
- Provides motivation and energy to settle conflicts and take care of yourself as long as it’s not being expressed inappropriately.
- It’s important to minimize negative reactions, maximize positive reactions.
- Anger is about threat. Response to being threatened. Anger or fear. If it’s unmanageable, it becomes fear. If it’s manageable one becomes angry to get rid of it.
- We may see threats where there aren’t any.
- Triggers from the past can cause anger. Things from your past can trigger threat.
- When you’re sick, tired or stressed you don’t reason as well as when you’re calm. You don’t think as clearly, and you may become angry.
- It’s easier to learn when to keep quiet and try to deal with it when you’re feeling better.
- Emotions are just a message that there is a need. Negative emotions mean there was a loss, and positive emotions means something was fulfilled.
- Emotions are just information.
- Act on the emotion, don’t act it out. Respond, don’t react.
- Recognize patterns, find resolve.
12:50 – Core Beliefs
- Core beliefs that shape your interpretations of the world were developed by a little kid. For some people that never changes.
- Never stop growing and maturing.
- Really shape the actions about how we react to things.
- What it means to be a man or a woman. What are relationships about? What is success? What is life after death? Shape the reactions we have to other people
- We are distracted from our core beliefs by media and technology. It’s necessary to unplug sometimes and spend less time with electronics.
- Beneficial to examine your core beliefs, and what they mean to you. Self-examine, and reflect.
15:20 – Anger: Taming the Beast – Human Behaviour and emotions
- Can we control our anger?
- What are some of the things that can cause anger?
- What anger is appropriate? Is the level appropriate? Will it cause another person harm?
- Recognize how we’re behaving towards something.
- People will downplay their anger.
- Anger can give people social power
- Fear, and making people afraid of your anger can give you a certain level of control.
- People will minimize the consequences of their behaviour. They may say “what’s the big deal?”
- People will modify their behaviour around people of authority. People will consider the consequences.
- As an adult, you can manage your emotions and control your behaviour. Keep in mind your actions, and your behaviour.
- Challenge your should / must thinking.
- When people feel vulnerable, they become defensive, and resort to something that makes them feel strong. Convert to anger for strength.
- Fight or flight when faced with confrontation.
- Learn to become okay with embarrassment and making mistakes.
- If someone’s behaviour is irrational, it’s because their beliefs are irrational.
- Ask yourself why you’re feeling threatened.
- Many people will label certain emotions as “taboo” so they resort to anger to cover it up. Find a way to let go of this way of thinking
29:52 – Emotions and children.
- Children model behaviour from the people in their lives.
- Discover the child’s “theme” How can you encourage a child in that theme?
- Build their confidence and communicate effectively with them about their strengths and weaknesses.
- How can you give them structure to deal with these insecurities?
- Build confidence.
- Teachable vs unteachable moments.
- Success comes with the quality of your relationship.
- Encouragement and support is necessary.
- Spend time with your kids and develop a relationship
- Don’t be irrational.
- Share your experiences
- There will always be difficult moments with children
- There’s always another tomorrow.
36:40 – How Reneau has added value
- Private practice for 20 years
- Taught at college for 15 years
- Does counselling on the side through church
37:41 – links and where to find Reneau
YouTube Channel: www.youtube.com/channel/UCSCyerIGxlgSf_8-U0UQ7lQ
39:19 – Outro
Den Of Pride Links: